I’d like to talk today about a phenomenon I call Car Park Obliviousness Syndrome, or CPOS for short. Okay, as an acronym it sucks, but then that seems oddly appropriate given that it’s a descriptor for one of life’s great irritations.
I’ve no idea whether this is just confined to Stockport and the surrounding area, as I’ve never really driven around car parks elsewhere in the country, but today while my dad was finding a parking space at the local shopping centre before we went for a coffee, no fewer than three pedestrians wandered into the path of the car. Admittedly they were all a good few feet away – it wasn’t as if my dad had to slam on the brakes at any point – but all appeared to be completely unaware of the presence of our vehicle, despite the fact that they were walking in a place that cars often drive around.
Such were the vacant, dead-eyed expressions on their faces, it was like an incredibly mundane, parochial version of Day of the Dead, these zombie-like entities shuffling around vaguely, seemingly unable to comprehend the world around them. Once or twice my dad’s hand hovered over the horn, ready to parp, but he resisted the temptation, instead slowing down to a virtual crawl, as we both stared, fascinated, at this bizarre phenomenon.
This collective awareness bypass extended to the servers in the coffee shop, who seemed all too happy to continue their conversation while a queue of customers increased both in number and in frustration. I’m pretty sure this isn’t just a localised phenomenon, so if you have any examples of CPOS – or similarly ignorant behaviour from the great unwashed – to share, then please do so in the comments below.